I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
Dude..TWLOHA day. gonna write LOVE on my arms before going to the bar tonight. its like a pussy guarantee.
i was in the bathroom puking my brains out, a girl walked in and said "i just came to do the same thing" so i told her i would move over and share the toilet. its better than being alone.
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
I'm not sure what happened last night, but I have someone stored in my phone as 'Aftershock'
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
Just caught myself trying to make grilled cheese with the stove off. I think my dad knows I'm high.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
last final went out with a bang.. 20 min late bra-less, cum in my hair and i still cant find my shoes.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Randomize
