as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Oh boy...do i want the 'something you can tell your mom in 10 yrs' version or the 'Im gonna call you a whore but be proud' version?
I'm having flashbacks from last night. Did I admit to pausing Whitney's funeral because I was watching porn? I believe I did.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
I lost my pants last night, she told me I walked into their room after leaving 5 minutes before wearing my thong.....and no pants. I have absolutely no idea where I left them.
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