ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
A girl just asked me to co-sign for her boob job because she didn't have enough credit built up. This is a first.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
Pretty sure I just scored Election Day sex based on the theory that if either of these fools win the world as we know it is over so we might as well get a few orgasms in...
But the problem is you celebrate with your heart but I celebrate with my liver
A guy who takes a plate of chicken tenders away from us is not to be trusted or slept with
Randomize
