D3 body, D1 cock
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
Just saw a porn entitled "Nad Biter". Redheads are now forever out of the picture.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
This guy punched out a light, puked in the sink, stole the mailbox, then tried to tell ME that I had to leave the party... Then his dog shit on the floor.
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
We can only continue to use the "oh what's the difference between circumcised and uncircumcised" for a few more months before people will see through our lies
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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