Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Making jello shots drunk, i apologize ahead of time if they are too strong Can't taste anything.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
One does not fall in love, one falls flat on the their face after leaving a bar
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
I think I just shit out all my problems.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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