I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I couldn't get internet on my iPod in this hotel room for porn, so I made due with UFC.
I'm not sure what to say to that.
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Can you get winded from lip syncing? I don't know how Britney does it
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
Randomize
