My sheets look like a crime scene.
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
Im sorry that my initial plan of you grabbing his dick didnt work out but Im glad you grabbed his heart
That dude with the beard walked up to me, turned my water into wine with everclear and kool-aid, and walked away. Pretty sure drunk Jesus is back.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
After sex he just told me I'm definitely pregnant and it's a girl. Should I run?
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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