So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
I'm at the gas station where we got beef jerky and condoms. The fact that those two are in the same sentence makes me love you more.
we were sitting in the bathtub when she came in with her grandpas cane adn beat us until lindsay passed out
don't be alarmed if you come back and i'm passed out drunk and naked cuddling with the franzia.
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
We're like Siamese twins, but joined at the genitals.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Thanks to you and Ketel One I now have a court summons with the actual word "frolicking" on it.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
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