Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
i think the beer goggles wore off after hearing the story of her 2nd abortion
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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