I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
I'm sitting by myself in my bra eating a waffle and drinking pineapple rum. gamedaaaayyyyyyy
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
do you think the bartender judged us for asking for shots of well vodka and water chasers?
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
And I'm bringing my coffee cup of wine.
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
Ok sry I left that ambiguous......did you want contact solution or fellatio?
Randomize
