i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Hey..um, you dont know me, but I just found your purse in a bush at the end of my street this morning
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I'm worried my dog collar isn't going to come in time. I might be trying on dog collars at PetSmart next week. That could get awkward.
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize