Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
I've just stalked all the hot guys who have clicked "attending". I now know which guys are "yes", "maybe" and "no". I only hope my drunk self remembers.
I'm not entirely sure what happened last night, but I think I dislocated my kneecap during an epic Mario Kart battle...
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
May he have a McRib induced stroke and lose the feeling in his tastebuds.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
within five minutes of being here her dog found my vibrator in my bedroom and was carrying it around all proud! and her mom is here. so embarrassing :(
Randomize
