why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Your wedding's just one more day in my life I can't wear sweat pants.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
