If i come over, it means nothing
$35 all you can drink last night. Friend 1 woke up in a hotel lounge, friend 2 pissed himself and woke up wearing friend 1's spare pants, and my toilet indicates I threw up extensively.
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Burnt my ear trying to use the bathroom blow dryer as a telephone.
I just came so hard there were tears. Actual tears.
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
did anyone ever come to your door asking about the blood on the floor?
Randomize
