Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
At lowes after workin outside. Kid behind me says "mommy that man smells like a taco" yes she was talking about me.
okay so using the row boat as a giant snow sled probably wasn't the best idea.
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
it's a "shave your legs in the cvs bathroom" kind of night
He's yummy.
HE'S GAY. AND 40.
Irrelevant.
Yehhhaaww I'm way ahead of you. I'm gunna get her a card that says " I'm sorry your now ex boyfriend decided to upgrade"
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Ive got small boobs, but they sure do like to pop out and party with the big dogs.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
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