For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
When you get to his house tomorrow, follow your instincts. Find the cat first.
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
