You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
im just going to superglue mistletoe to my forehead and see what happens
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
Proudest moment of my life. Just watched a guy walk into the side of a car because I winked at him. Love these yoga pants and my hair. Fuck yes. His mouth was hanging open.
There's a website where you can order a pile of horse shit to be dropped on a persons doorstep. So that's another option.
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
I've Ubered to the bar three times this weekend to get my car but every time I get there I end up drinking. Still no car.
Either it didn’t do much damage or I’ve lost all feeling in my asshole
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