just won 30 on black! Ok adicteddd! Never coming back gqmbeqing is easy.
now my debit card is betting 1k whoops. im gongk eh be rich!!!
whoops didnt work. think the gambeli mashine is busters!! now im betting 2k?! bad idea?
Just cropdusted the office
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Today was the day I stopped kidding myself and started buying the handle of vodka.
I feel like Tiger Woods should send Jesse James a gift basket or something...
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
Washing vom off hardwood, so much easier than carpet. Thank you adulthood!
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
I think there's a website warning girls about me based on the 4 who approached me separately tonight and called me evil. Fuckyoudave.com?
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
Randomize
