sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
30-degree weather + Metal Cockring Monday = really hard to pee.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
Randomize
