If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
I think my penis got bigger when i lost weight
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
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