i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Sushi was just eaten off my naked body. I feel like I can die in peace now.
I mean, as I was vomiting in front of a giant crucifix I became acutely aware of my poor choices
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Just passed the animal clinic parking lot I had to pull over to puke in during welcome week. I can almost hear the dogs barking at my shame again.
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
