i kinda do this "flirt with girls and pretend to be a hot white guy named chris" thing
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Eye surgery went well. Just can't believe it took getting lasers through my eyes to temporarily stop the vivid sex dreams I was having
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Just a warning... Flip, sip, or strip always ends in all participants being naked. Learning from experience.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
How bad would it be if I wore out the dress we got peed on in. You're the only one who knows.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
would it be uncouth to smoke a joint during office hours
This is why you're my favorite TA
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Have you ever tried to have sex with a fairy? My penis is literally bigger than her.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
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