I woke up this morning wearing my tux shirt and jacket, but no pants.
______ was pissed. My breath tastes like tequila and doritos, and I couldn't get it up.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
So when I got her home I realized being a lesbian again isn't like riding a bike...
My week is over as of 8pm tonight, and I'm herpes free...Let's rage
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
I wonder if a fish could survive in vodka
I could
I look like a bag of dicks so if you could ugly yourself up that'd be great.
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
Girl just left one of the apts upstairs carrying a giant bottle of kahlula and a lunchable.... I feel like we could be friends
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
