so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
YO CONGRATULATIONS ON YOUR MÉNAGE À TROIS. YOU GO, GLENN COCO
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
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