The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
just took my birth control pill with a shamrock shake. happy st. patrick's day
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
This is my gift to your gina
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
I didn't know it was possible and I don't know if I'll ever be able to do it again on my own but he literally fuck me sideways.
Randomize
