he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I just wanted to say sorry for trying to jack off your dog last night.
we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
Would you like to blur the lines between friendship and lesbianism tonight?
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
Randomize
