I saw him at work today and he gave me a really awkward "I know what you do drunk" look...
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
Somebody spraypainted a transformers head on a transformer box..my life is complete
Is it obsessive that I keep picking my crazy sex rug burn scab so it leaves a scar I can remember him by?
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
Randomize
