Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
Only a mothe r could love this liver
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Do you remember feeding the vacuum doritos last night?
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
Randomize
