You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Ok so my english teacher told me i could have 5 absences bc of my "problem". I have no idea what she is talking about
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Can't a woman sleep on the floor in her own apartment in peace without being judged?
Just ate a chocolate chip cookie upside down. This is what having a degree does for you.
I should have made a run for it. Seriously who calls the cops on themselves and goes to jail. ...on a Monday.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I just want to buy drugs without having to pay an arm and a leg for it. Is that a horrible thing to ask for?
I mean, it's not like you can exactly complain to the manager and higher ups about it.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
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