I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
Well good for him for getting your number before he told you he had no money and needed you to pay for his drink!
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
What type of bandaid should I use on my clit
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
