Whod you bang
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
September 16th, captains log. I awoke in a daze, not sure of my location
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Oral stamina is what keeps life exciting
Randomize
