Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i just found a cheeto on my floor and ate it. i might still be drunk.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
What the fuck dude? Now it's a "who is this?" convo going back and forth. Like... helllloooo you just sent me a picture of your penis! I'm entitled to ask who the fuck it is. I can't verify an identity by a body part.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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