Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
accomplished twins. life is a go
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Dude, just be careful. Her invitation for BJ is just a trap for her to stick her finger up your ass.
I just looked into the eyes of the man whose car I peed on last night
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize
