escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
So I've reached a new low. After completing my walk of shame and being told "see you around", I took off my heels to discover he had came in my shoe.
I think I've done enough damage with my vagina as of late, thank you
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Can you get the dildos out of the shower before the maids come?
Randomize
