dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
I knew from the second he called his penis glorious that I was meant to sleep with him
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Note to self: I can rip apart her vagina and she'll still cuddle with me, but if I steal her Chapstick she'll murder me !?
Randomize
