and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
If I don't have herpes this will be the single greatest day of my life
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Need. Hospital. Physically am floating.
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
