I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
At some point last night Lemondrops turned into me doing shots of vodka and eating sugar packets at the bar.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Would it be weird if I congratulated the guy who almost broke up my marriage for working on the marriage equality bill? You know, thanks for fighting for the sanctity of marriage. Weird, right?
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
So then we ended up at a bar full of navy SEALs and I got one of them to take his shirt off, then I felt him up
I feel like 31-year old me is 21-year old me's hero
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
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