he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
i just googled "who won the civil war" . how can i still have a 97% in this class?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Oh my god, I totally forgot we call your penis "Godzilla's Tail".
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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