She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He wouldn't let me ride him with a Ninja Turtles hat on...
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
Damn, well, it could always be worse
For sure, I could be a prison bitch right now. Thursdays aren't half bad
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
Randomize