THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize
