you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
Is it penis luge time yet?
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
OH BABY IM HERE AND IN A BLANKET FORT
COME TO THE BLANKET FORT
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I need to calm my uterus...
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
Is it weird to invite your FWB to thanksgiving dinner??
He sent me a dick pic from a port-o-potty in Boston. If that's not love Idk what is.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
