I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Randomize
