I think im pregnant
I think you have the wrong number
I just saw a San Diego firetruck. No wonder they can't figure out how to fight wildfires if they get so fucking lost they end up in Nebraska.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I love seeing you outside of a bar. It's like seeing a dog walk on its hind legs
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
Randomize