i'm at a stripclub and this bitch just lit her nipples on fire!
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
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I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
Just got a blowjob in her closet with two people sleeping outside in the room. I feel like the emperor of college.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
that's where you went wrong. never assume I'm adult enough to do something on my own.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
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