Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
you were having sex in the bathroom so i pee'd in your bong water...
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
BUT I think maybe Thursday in celebration of America we should probably tan and see how fast we can finish everything in the liquor cabinet.
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
wish he had known he had poison ivy on his cock beforehand... Is calamine okay to put on your vag?..
Randomize
