On the quad today: An amish choir singing something weird, and not 30 feet away 3 girls tanning topless. Definition of diversity.
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Taco Bell drive through. Chick got out of the car in front of us and threw up on the hood of my car!
Not okay.
Please please please buy brown eye liner on your way home in the morning... I'm missing an eyebrow
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Mom told me you snuck booze into a concert in a cheez its box...I have never been prouder to be related to you
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
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