I solve my problems like an adult, at the strip club drinking on a work night.
what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Let the vodka take you where it will. Like Pocahontas, but wasted
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
He just whispered "doors are weird" and then laughed so hard he fell down the stairs.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
