it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
you're asking me why i keep burn ointment in my purse.... do you really want to know the answer to that question?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Tequila me may have very bluntly told him that I wanted to touch his abs.
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Let's say we can see the evolution of our "relation" by his name in my phone. Pizza slice emoticone. Pizza guy. Jordan. Jo. Jackhammer Pizza Guy. Jockhammer pizza guy.
Randomize