no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
He told me they were just razor bumps!
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
i passed out twice in the shower, twice on the bathroom floor, once holding the toilet bowl and 8 times moving from the bathroom to my bed. Tequila sucks.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
When you trip so hard that you can see your friends thoughts through their pupils.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
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