Whoa Z and x make the same sound
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
Success! We fucked roommates!
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
conclusion: canadians have really freaky sex
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
Randomize
